Pre-BlogHer

I was just reading the post geared towards the BlogHer '12 newbies and one of the recommendations was to write about the experience before, during and after.  This is my before post.

I feel like a newbie often lately with all my "getting out there" bloggy writing stuff.  The funny thing about being nervous all the time is that the steady nervousness stops having the same impact.  I'm almost not freaking out about BlogHer being less than 9 weeks away.  Almost.

Seriously, though?  Oh crap, BlogHer is less than 9 weeks away!!!

I have so many things I want to do.  I have so many things I need to do.

My computer and phone are both on their way out.  I'm not up for a phone upgrade until September - a month after the conference.  Which means I'm either going to need to park myself next to an outlet or carry a really long extension cord and leave my hotel room door open.  I need to get to the Apple store and have my computer looked at.  I'm not really sure what to tell them to look for except "make it better" and I'm sure they'll say buy a new one and I'm sure that will make me sad because I really can't.

I need to buy new clothes.  When I bought all the new clothes last year, I vowed to lose weight but that didn't happen.  And I wore all that stuff so much that it's looking, um, worn.  So I need new stuff and I don't want to buy clothes at this weight.  So at best I have 8 weeks to lose weight and then go shopping the weekend before the conference so I don't look like a tattered mess.  Grr.

I also need to get a haircut and get it colored.  Yes, I'm that vain.  I don't want to meet people for the first time in old clothes that don't fit with gray, unkempt hair.  There.  I said it.  I need new make up, too.  And shoes.

I need to schedule what I'll do when.  There are agendas posted and I haven't really read them yet.  There are parties planned.  I know that most people would fly by the seat of their pants, but I am absolutely incapable of that.  This is going to require spreadsheets.  Pros and cons lists.

My wonderful IRL friend Dana of The Chrome Phase will be coming up to my house from her house on Wednesday night and then we'll be traveling into Manhattan at the crack of dawn.  I have to plan for a cab to take us and I'm kind of freaking out about that because I hate calling places in general and I've never called for a cab before.  Maybe I'll make Dana do it.   She's awesome for stuff like that - she talks me off ledges and doesn't ever make me feel stupid for climbing up on them in the first place.  She's like my human Xanax.  She also does a magnificent job cleaning stainless steel refrigerators.

I will have to practice pack.  How can I do that when I don't even have clothes yet???

Oh, and we're going on our family vacation 2 weeks prior to the conference, so I have to plan for that, too.  I'm worried that I won't have enough time to panic about BlogHer if I'm busy panicking about our vacation.  Panicking takes up a lot of time, you know.

I need to order my business cards.  I need to buy a new wallet and a suitable purse.  I know the second thing really sounds like it has nothing to do with this, but I just remembered that I need to.  Do you see how the list just grows and grows?

I need to get my running going because I'm running in the 5k on Friday morning.  You know what happened last time I ran a 5k.  I don't really want that to happen again.  I need to buy sneakers.  And a running outfit.

(You would think from all this talk about buying new clothes to look cute in that I run around dressed well all of the time.  On a weekly basis, I wear a promotional T from The Hangover Part 2 that my husband got for free somewhere.  It's powder blue and is a men's XL.  I'm just under 5 feet tall, mind you.  It says Thailand or Bust across the front.  I wear this with yoga pants and $2 flip flops that are 3 years old.  I wear this to work.)

Finally, I need to make a list of all the people I know are going that I want to meet.  I have to practice introducing myself to people so that I don't sound like it's my first day out ever.  I think I need to up my social media game so you don't wonder who the hell I am when I'm all "I follow you on Twitter and I read your blog and I think you're so cool and, and, and, will you be my friend, pleeeeeeeeease????"

If you're going to BlogHer too, let me know, because I'd love to meet you.  Hopefully after you've read what a total freak I am, you'll still want to meet me.  Or, if you don't want to meet me, you can study my profile pic here or on Twitter and know how to avoid me.  My hair is longer now, but I can't tell you if it will be straight or curly.  You'll have to be prepared for both.

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